Butterflies or serious struggles? Gauging your student's mental health on back-to-school week

SALT LAKE CITY — The backpack is packed, the outfit is selected and an alarm is set — all signs the first day of school is destined for success. However for some kids, the hardest part of going back to school isn't finding the right supplies, it's managing the emotions that a new year brings.

Intermountain Health pediatric mental health specialist Dr. Annie Deming says a little anxiety is expected, especially for younger kiddos who may be starting school for the first time or adjusting to a new environment.

"It's really normal for kids to be a bit nervous about school starting," Deming said.

But there is a difference between a few butterflies and more serious struggles.

"If they're refusing to go to school or if every single morning it's a fight to kind of get them out of the door, that's more problematic," she said.

Other warning signs can include pulling away from friends, changes in eating or sleeping, emotional outbursts or physical symptoms like stomachaches and headaches.

Deming said one of the best things parents can do is create a sense of consistency with routines around sleep, meals and screen time while also making space for kids to talk about how they're feeling.

"Something that kids really do value are concrete ways that they can feel connected to parents and to their family while they're away from them," Deming said.

That could be a note in a backpack, asking specific questions after school, or simply reminding kids they have someone to talk to.

Deming says parents should remember their own emotions matter, too.

"It's OK for parents to get frustrated or upset or scared or anxious," she said. "We're human too. We need those moments to have those feelings."

Because sometimes the most important thing a child needs heading into a new school year is knowing they're not facing it alone.

If your child is struggling, there are resources available: The SafeUT app offers free mental health support and Primary Children's Hospital-Taylorsville has a 24-hour crisis center for more immediate needs. The Suicide & Crisis Lifeline can also be reached at any time by calling or texting 988.

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