The man who summited the 8 Crowns

SALT LAKE CITY — On Dec. 23, 2024, one Salt Lake City man accomplished what had before seemed impossible.

Or at least medically inadvisable.

Local engineer Bryant Heath — who runs the SLSees Twitter and Instagram account where he documents the interesting and quirky elements of Salt Lake City — summited the eight crowns.

The eight crowns, Heath explained, refer to the eight different Crown Burgers locations ranging as far north as Layton as far south as Sandy, and as far west as West Valley City. The term actually comes from a story I wrote years ago about the origins of fry sauce.

In said story, the owner of the North Temple Crown Burgers Mike Katsavenas referred to what was then the seven different Crown Burgers locations as the "seven crowns." Since the time of publication, an eighth location has opened in Holladay. It's an express location with no indoor seating but it still counts and was numbered among the stops Heath set out to visit — and eat something at — all in one day. To him, it felt akin to summiting the highest peak on every continent. I personally think it's even more impressive.

Crown Burgers, an historic staple in the Salt Lake City culinary landscape, is known for many things. First and foremost the titular Crown Burger — a quarter-pound patty topped with thousand island dressing, lettuce, tomato and onions, cheese, and a heaping pile of pastrami.

The franchise is also known for a surprisingly robust Greek menu and what is, for my money, the best gyro in the state. Crown Burgers is not, however, known for lite fare. One single meal from Crown Burgers is typically enough dense calories to make the average connoisseur very full. Eight in one day is borderline dangerous. But also brave.

As far as I know, this is the first time my writing has ever inspired anyone to do anything, so I obviously had to talk with Heath to learn more about this monumental accomplishment and find out how much credit, or responsibility, I could or should take. The answer, sadly and thankfully, was very little. This was all Heath's doing. And it was quite a bit of doing.

He started his journey first thing that Monday morning by visiting the Crown Burgers drive-thru in South Salt Lake at 9 a.m. (the dining room was not yet open). He was delighted to learn that Crown Burgers has a breakfast menu and ordered a breakfast sandwich which he described as "delicious." From there he drove to the Layton location and ordered a junior cheeseburger because what better way to settle the stomach after a breakfast sandwich an hour prior?

Next he hit the North Temple downtown Salt Lake City location, which we both agreed is the second best location, what with its fireplace, woodland-themed wallpaper, green leather chairs and grandfather clock. There he ordered souvlaki on a stick. Just one because he was starting to feel full and still had five locations left to visit. From there he zipped over to the other downtown location on 200 South and ordered baklava, a comparatively light caloric load, believe or not, that he described as "a great little bite."

Then he began his journey southward to what we agree is the best location — the Millcreek Crown Burgers. Stepping into the interior of this location feels like stepping into King Arthur's castle with its intricate stone fireplace, ornate chandeliers and big wooden furniture. There he ordered the mixed meat gyro having had a whole 30 minutes to digest the baklava.

From there he drove to Holladay and ordered fries at the express location, where the cashier was so amused by Heath's endeavor that he gave him an extra fry sauce on the house.

When he arrived a the Sandy location on State Street, Heath was feeling very full. At the outset of the journey he had committed to eating the entirety of everything he ordered. By this point he had eaten an entire breakfast sandwich, an entire junior cheeseburger, all the chicken on the souvlaki stick, the baklava, a whole gyro and an order of fries. So he decided to play it safe and ordered … a strawberry milkshake.

And then at long last, six hours after beginning his journey, he ended it at 3 p.m. in West Valley City where he met friend and host of the City Cast Salt Lake podcast Ali Vallarta, who bought him a Crown Burger. "He seemed so much better than I expected," Vallarta told me.

Upon completing the crown burger, he was satiated, he said. "A little too satiated," he added. He didn't feel like he ever needed to eat again, and indeed, he did not until well into the next day. But he wasn't just physically full. He was also full of the sense of achievement that comes from accomplishing something so monumentous and unprecedented.

I asked Heath to articulate how he felt after all eight successful summits.

"Undoubtedly, equating this challenge of mine to summiting the highest peaks on each continent is mean to be tongue-in-cheek," he said. "But through the humor it did seem to resonate — dare I say inspire — people to find ways to turn the mundane of daily life into something ever-so-slightly special. There are a lot of interesting and creative things out there to do, if you have the appetite."

While Heath is quick to downplay the significance of his successful journey, I'm here to suggest that perhaps we should make him the king of Utah. I do apologize to those who ran and won government seats through the democratic process, but I think this process is just way cooler. And one that we should repeat every four years. They among us who successfully summit the eight crowns shall lead.

Or maybe there's no one else who can do it. Or no one who will even dare attempt such a perilous undertaking. In which case maybe the better option is a state holiday. We could make every Dec. 23 Crown Burgers day and eat onion rings in remembrance of the Salt Lake Instagrammer who gave an entire day, over $50, a tank of gas, and his physical comfort for such a noble cause.

Related topics