Moms need more support, mental health experts say in wake of West Haven deaths

WEST HAVEN, Weber County — The death of a mother by suicide and the killing of her three children in West Haven has left a family grieving and searching for answers.

Maternal mental health experts in Utah want moms to know there is help available.

Those experts say support is best thing to help young mothers — and they want all moms across Utah to know that if they're struggling, they're not alone.

"It's, of course, really hard to make sense of something like this," said Camille Hawkins, a licensed clinical social worker and co-founder of Chapters and Seasons Counseling. "I often see that parents will get a lot of support with their first baby and then with their second baby, maybe not as much and then third baby — nobody's there."

As a therapist who specializes in postpartum mood disorders, she meets with women in Utah daily who are struggling while trying to care for small children.

"The postpartum period is, of course, a vulnerable time. There's a lot going on. But even beyond that, parenthood, life is challenging," Hawkins said.

Police have ruled the death of Maribel Ibarra and her three children a murder-suicide. Her family has said they didn't know she was suffering.

Hawkins hopes society at large can do a better job of supporting new mothers.

"I really think that what we're missing is the village mentality," she said. "If we are alone in our house caring for children and babies, people aren't going to see if we're struggling. If we're in a village — if we are with mothers, grandparents, aunts, nieces, nephews, then there's more of the sharing of the load physically and logistically, but also more of people being able to check in and see, 'Oh, wow, you know, something is seeming off.'"

Amy-Rose White is a perinatal psychotherapist and has been working in Utah for dozens of years supporting women through perinatal mood disorders.

"If you see something, say something about someone that you love. And if you don't feel like yourself, keep reaching out for help until you get what's actually going to be effective for you," White said.

Not speaking specifically about Ibrarra's case, White said that, in general, postpartum mood disorders can show up at any point during the first two years postpartum. Those mood disorders can include depression, anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, postpartum bipolar disorder and postpartum psychosis.

"At least a quarter of all American women will have postpartum depression clinically, which often ... looks more anxious, irritable, anger and rageful than it does, you know, crying under a blanket and being nonfunctional all day," White said.

Most importantly, though, White and Hawkins say regardless of whether you've been diagnosed, there is help in Utah.

"Don't give up. Help is out there. Keep trying. You're worth it," White said.

There are resources to help parents:

Help Me Grow Utah — a helpline for pregnant parents and families with children 8 and under;

Postpartum Support International Utah — help and resources about perinatal mood and anxiety disorders;

Huntsman Mental Health Perinatal Services — maternal mental health services;

Postpartum.net — support for postpartum mothers;

Psychology Today — a list of therapists in Utah;

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